Yearly Health Screening

This week was a face-your-own-mortality week for me. I got my blood work done and a health screening at my employer’s expense. I was informed that my cholesterol was high along with my blood pressure. Also, my BMI is too high. Essentially, I am a wreck.

Like most people I know, I knew all that before I was stuck–ever so slightly–on my left ring fingertip. Mostly, I went to get a flu shot. My company provides these for free. The cynical reader might point out that this is good for them because sick people don’t come to work. Ok. But I don’t like the flu, either. It’s a win-win in my book.

Lots of the things that Microsoft does in the benefit package are like that. And personally, I find it great having health insurance and getting bonuses. So, good job, Microsoft. I understand that it is not charity either. Bill and Steve or whoever is in charge now provide this benefit because they can, and, in fact, they must provide these benefits to retain employees who would otherwise go to Google, Amazon, Oracle or Apple, to name but a few.

Our yearly health screening can also include sitting down with a nice nurse who will tell you what you can do to improve your numbers. This year I opted out of that. Why? Because of the effect known as “same shit, different day.” I have heard a 3 to 5  strategies for lowering my cholesterol. Indeed, I take Niaspan, Fish Oil, Red Rice Yeast, low dose aspirin among other things. I have heard this for several years. More cardio, lose some weight. All of this is well-intentioned.

It is more of emphasis for me because I am in the group of people who already have heart disease. As I have written before, I have a replacement aortic valve.


I think it is fair to say that I’m not a tub of goo. I’m not skinny either. For my height, my weight is not terrible. I would love to do some more exercise. I would love to have a bit more control over my weight. Who wouldn’t? But I find that I have little interest in pursuing either thing with much more vigor. There are times when I think my father’s solution to this is the best: If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.

There is so much seemingly conflicting data about what to eat, how much to exercise, what supplements are important. I find my eyes glazing over. My doctor has said the same thing over and over too. He advocates the TQI diet. Essentially, eat less meat but more protein. Cut down or out on sugar, rice, pasta and bread. Potatoes are a maybe. Okay. Sure. I feel like I don’t eat a lot of that already but seriously? Sugar makes some sense but how much pasta? Once a year? Twice a year? How little is little enough?

My father will start prostate cancer treatment in a few weeks. He’s 74. And the prognosis is good. The treatment will be radiation only. He lived at least this long with a diet of the average American mixed in with some additional bad habits. I’m not calling him out here. But for the record: He smoked. He drinks alcohol. And he has some chronic issues: rheumatoid arthritis and COPD. But he’s sanguine about it!

I appreciate your looking out for me, medical community. You are doing your job. I get it.  But I am a bit beat down by the whole advice thing sometimes. It’s not your fault, I guess. But how ’bout for the rest of the year, we give it a rest, drink a bit of wine, have a couple x-mas cookies, maybe some nog, and just enjoy each other’s company a bit.

One thought on “Yearly Health Screening

  1. I also hurt my back pretty good. Cleaning up branches after a wind storm and then moving a tree. I had a swimming lesson on Tuesday, butterfly. By Wednesday I was icing and heating and taking Alleve. Yikes.

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