I have never been particularly good at identifying what I need. I don’t mean the food, oxygen, water types of need. I mean the “I need a vacation” statements that other people make.
- I admire those who know that type of thing.
- I just need to lie down.
- I just need a few days off.
- I need some sun.
- I need to eat something.
Those all sound a bit like traps to me. What if you take some time off and still feel kinda shitt?
I don’t exactly know why I don’t what I need but mostly I don’t. I realize when people say that they need this or that, they really mean that they could return to a better state of mind, or just feel a bit better. They don’t really think they “NEED” it either.
I admire that quality: the ability to identify what is going to help you feel better and then taking care of it. Suffering through some type of unpleasantness is a requirement of daily life. We all have jobs or do things that don’t provide 100% ecstasy all the time. Even if you are one of those people who loves their job, it has its tedium too, right?
But why I seem to be inclined to just suffer a bit more. I at least know that I am a bit off. I should start to look for what might make me feel better.
I think something like meditation helps me do that. Forcing myself to just sit quietly for ten minutes generally does feel good. I don’t know why. And I was skeptical but doing it seemed to help me. It is an attempt at a basic level to just get your brain out of some kind state where you don’t have control over your thoughts. I’m sure there is a better explanation than that because reading it back, it sounds like nonsense. Sounds a bit like yourself telling yourself it is not listening to yourself. Hey you, you are talking to you!
Today, I’m trying to just tune into that a little bit. I wanted to write a blog post to get this off my chest. Well I did that. And if feels pretty good.
I also want to “not be at work.” I don’t want to check my email or really worry about anything that happened this week. It wasn’t terrible but it was far from fun. And indeed, it was not a normal week.
It’s hot here too. It’s a good day to just relax, stay out of the sun and pick your spots for being active. That all sounds like “what I need.”
Swim.If it's hot, swim. Then you have to focus on one thing. Getting from one end of the pool to the other. It achieves several objectives. Your body is active, you cool your core, and focus your thoughts on one thing which clears away the 'clutter' for a while.Maybe what you 'need' is to swim.